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I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
16 March 2009 @ 11:53 pm


Ok, so and update on the situation with Mr. Projectionist. Well, we're talking now, which is always a plus. I finally worked up the courage to say hi. He's a really nice guy, sweet as hell, if a little clueless. I usually spend my breaks with him in the projection box, which some of the older team members havent been in yet, let alone wandered round and pushed buttons and stuff!
He is definitely interested in me, and we have been doing the whole, smoochy smoochy canoodling stuff but nothing has been made official yet. I dont mean to everyone else, i mean to me. I have no idea what he's expecting or even what he wants. But everyone keeps telling me to take it slow, get to know him and see whats happens.

That would be easy ... if i werent so gad damn impatient!!!! I guess i've got a few more hours in the projection room to go before i get any closer. I really want this one to work out. xx

 
 
location: bedroom
Emotion: confused
Tunes: tawlor swift - white horses
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
02 March 2009 @ 02:07 pm
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bout bloody time. i am no longer unemployed. i am a little late in telling you this, i got the job three weeks a go. But i have the coolest job in the world. I am essentially a movie theatre staff member. doesnt sound like much but for me its amazing. Odeon theatres, which is the biggest theatre company in europe, is my new boss and all i do all day is give people popcorn or stand around or watch bits of films. I know ... sounds riveting doesnt it. but thats not the best bit. the best bit is the perks. Half price popcorn ... yeah thats ok but ... free films!!!!!!!!!!! i NEVER HAVE TO PAY TO SEE A FILM ... well for as long as i work there. its fantastic coz prices are not student friendly.
Plus sometimes they have "team screenings" where they show a film at midnight, just for team members, so we can tell guests about them. On thursday theyre showing Watchmen, which i soooooooooooooooooooooo want to see.

The other good thing about the new job, new eye candy. i may have developed a little thing for one of the projectionists. hes called jamie, hes 35 and hes sosososososo shy. i havent actually spoken to him yet, but we've been making eyes at each other and im just waiting for something to happen. i aint making the first move, although, i may have to at this rate. I'll keep you posted on the progress of this new potential fella. I just wish my uni work was as fun ... you cant have everything right
 
 
location: bedroom
Tunes: akon - im so paid
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
03 February 2009 @ 12:06 pm


As some of you may know (because you live here or you may ahve heard) England has been hit with the new Ice Age. Not really, but it was snowing for two days straight and all hell broke loose. We're not used to it here. If its not rain, we dont know how to cope! In Surrey we got about 8 inches, which is alot. Its been the worst snowfall for 18 years.

Now, as muh as i love snow, i hate the effect it has on things like traffic, and businesses. I ordered groceries online coz the nearest supermarket is ages away to walk. They were supposed to come yesterday but didnt coz of the snow. No call or email telling me they wouldnt be coming or anything. The only time i order groceries is when im out of food. So yesterday i had one meal, and had to tip toe to the nearest corner shop for a pot noodle. I wasnt best pleased.

Im hoping they come today, which they better had bcoz i got the day off lectures (coz of the snow). I doubt i'll have the same luck tomorow. I just need my groceries ... getting quite hungry now!

 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
30 January 2009 @ 06:07 pm

Here are 17 Rihanna icons, usual rules, comments are love and thanks to Brit for telling me how the lj cuts work.

preview:

   


 

got my mind on my money and im not going away )


 

Tags:
 
 
location: bedroom
Tunes: who's line is it anyway
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
30 January 2009 @ 10:56 am
?  
Can anyone explain why the lj cuts wont work, have they changed since ive been away. i got some new icons but i cant seem to put them in a cut coz it keeps messing me around.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
01 January 2009 @ 08:49 pm


Im back with some icons to signal the start fo 2009! Usual rules apply and enjoy!


Kate Winslet

1.   2.   3.   4.


Annie Liebovitz Photography


5.   6.   7.   8.  

9.  10.

America's next top model
 

11.  12.  13.   14.

15.  16.   17.   18.

19.  20.  21.   22.

23.   24.   25.   26.

27.   28.  

Ben Barnes

29.   30.   31.   32.

33.

 
 
Tunes: lady gaga - just dance
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
01 January 2009 @ 08:28 pm

Okay, sorry to leave it ... 6 months between entries, guess i got caught up in other things. After re reading my last entry, i find it hard to believe i was ever that happy. Hope you're all ready for a big update becasue things have changed.
After my birthday (even though it felt more like my twin brothers birthday and i was just crashing) i got in touch with Jon through facebook. Those of you who are not familiar with jon, he was a teacher from my high school that i've been crazy about for 6 years. We got to talking about his new band and the fact that they had a gig not too far from me. He invited me and i went and yes we ended up sleeping together. Turns out he'd been looking for an excuse to meet up since we became facebook friends (thank god for the wonder of social network sites). we had a great night, i was very happy and then the next day reality came crashing down as he told me it was just a one night thing and he didnt want a relationship. His choice, fair enough, i can deal with that.
Didnt stop me from being sad though. But i wasnt sad for long. I'd met a guy called Gordon when i went back to Uni after summer. We clicked, we saw each other, we slept together, he ended it. Told me he wasnt comfortable with the age difference (he was 41). No big deal, would have been a hard one to explain to my parents anyway. There were one or two after gordon but none of them were serious. They all left me feeling dirty, used and worthless but i picked myself up and carried on scars and all.
Then there was Pete. Pete started off as a friend. I knew he liked me, its how we got talking. but i was with someone else at the time. Nevertheless we talked a lot, every day in fact and i felt so drawn to him. It was like one of those movie feelings, the "i'm not quite sure why but there's definitely something about him that im connecting with and this hasnt happened before" feeling. So i ended the other relationship and started one with him. It's been two months, and its not without his flaws. But everytime something bad happens i find myself saying "things will get better, just wait it out". He suffers from depression and on his bad days he closes everyone out, including me. He started a bad phase not long before Christmas and is still going through it. I havent heard his voice since the 17th of December and im a mess because of it. Im home for the holidays and so far away from him i dont know what to do. People keep telling me he's not worth it, if he cared about me he'd call. I'm starting to believe them. Im so confused and i spent New Years alone and crying.

But it is a New Year, and im sick of being messed around. I think ive had quite enough these past six months. Time to focus on me for a little while. Getting my body into shape, getting rid of this pathetic need for a man by my side and sorting out my life. Plus having a bit of fun too. Ive already arranged to meet up with Jon, Gordon and a few others. Enjoying yourself is not a crime, and i intend to do it.

So, thats what ive been doing, among other things. Good to be back, and its gonna be a great 2009!!!!Read more... )
 
 
location: bedroom
Tunes: pink - sober
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
15 July 2008 @ 12:25 pm
Dare i say it ... i think life is going pretty well right now. I think im actually happy.

A bold statement i know but lets look at it. I have a job that pays ok (not brilliantly but it is cornwall after all), and i get tips on top of that. On my last count i had over £60 in change from my tips. I have a house waiting for me in Kingston with 3 super cool roomates to share with. Ive got the party of the month planned for my 19th in two days, with all the friends ive stayed in touch with getting excited about it. Ive made lots of new friends who are also getting excited. I passed my first year at Uni with 2 C's, 3 B's and 3 A's and so ive a definite place waiting on my course. Lots of people begging for me to return to Kingston. Two toddler cousins coming to visit that i love to bits and cant wait to spoil rotten. Plus, theres the odd time at work when a customer will look at me in that sort of flirty, not-too-sleazy, i-think-you're-pretty sort of way and it makes my day, it really does. 

Although im not totally over Paul, (or the idea of being with someone in general) I think im doing okay. Im getting my life on track. I even bought a piar of running shoes to start jogging with. Is it possible to become a completely new person in the space of a few months, because i might be getting there. I think there was a point where i looked at myself and hated what i saw, and not just on the outside. Somehow, thats getting better, and it a great feeling. It really is. I hope you're all as happy as i am. Id love to know whats going on with all of you. Whats the happy hap?! xxx
 
 
Emotion: ecstatic
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
13 July 2008 @ 09:39 pm

Told you it wouldnt be long before i got you some david tennant icons. Here are a selection of images from all three seasons, and these are by no means the last of them. Usual rules apply, comments are orgasmic and please enjoy them!!!

preview:

   

 
 
location: living room
Emotion: gloomy
Tunes: silence
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
06 July 2008 @ 02:03 pm

Sorry, its been so long, what with coursework and now an actual job i dont find much time to update here. But, as you can see, im alive and kicking, and all is pretty much fine. Getting a lot of hours in but still not enough. I watched the final doctor who last night, OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Loved it!!!! Wont spoil it for anyone but it was amazing. I cant believe there isnt another one until Christmas. What will i do until then? 

I made some Rome icons, from the HBO series. Me and my parents watched both boxsets one after the other a few weeks back. it really is a great series. i highly recommend. Enjoy!! 

preview:
   

I dont doubt that there will be some Tennant icons very shortly, keep your eyes peeled.

 

 
 
location: living room
Emotion: grumpy
Tunes: once in a blue moon
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
17 June 2008 @ 03:47 pm
Just some icons that have been lurking around my comp for a while. Theyre pretty plain but the pictures are nice. 

4) POTC
2) Keira Knightley
9) Derren Brown
2) Stock
7) Amy Lee
4) Kelly Clarkson
1) Arwen

preview:

  

 
 
location: living room
Emotion: lazy
Tunes: El Tango De Roxanne - Moulin Rouge
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
19 May 2008 @ 11:58 am

Just a small update, to let you all know that i hate my miserable life. Paul hasnt mentioned anything of the kiss since it heppened, apart from the other night. My friend directed a play here and we were all at the after party, i was off my head, i'd had so much to drink and admittedly i was getting emotional. I was just so sick of not knowing how he felt!
So a friend took it upon herself to ask him. Here's what she told me:

Marissa: So, i hear you kissed Sarah
Paul: Yeah
Marissa: What do you think about her, would you go there?
Paul: Yeah

I'd like to add here that Paul would do anything with a pulse, and he was quite drunk. Still, its not the most enthusiastic answer and it didnt make me feel any better. He knows i like him coz i let it slip a few days ago, and after that he didnt talk to me for a week! Even now its a bare minimum. Is it coz hes shy around me and that night he kissed me because the booze had given him the confidence to go for it, or is it coz he finds me repulsive and hardly talks to me coz he cant face looking at me, except when hes had a few and i become acceptable.

I am getting so sick of this place, i need to go home. I've got 9 days, mums coming for me on the 28th. Im gonna spend my summer forgetting about him. I didnt come to uni to chase after guys, i came to get a degree. Now, i really need to go shopping, im starving. Typical student, ive been living on beans and noodles! xxx

 

 
 
location: dormroom
Emotion: melancholy
Tunes: silence
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
02 May 2008 @ 10:39 am
What is it with men that makes them unable to just do what theyre supposed to!? 

Ive been trying to get something, anything, out of Paul for months now, and finally given it up as a bad job. The second i start thinking, "Oooh, Pete, now there is something here", Paul only goes and kisses me!

Last night he hung back after everyone had left and told me that he didnt want to go home, i was adamnat he was going home coz he'd pissed everyone off including me, and then he kisses me. He was completely and utterly smashed, which might have been the reason for it, (if it was me ego's gonna take a hit) but seriously, i didnt want him, i wanted Pete who barely said two words to me all night! 

I could not be more confused right now!!!!!
 
 
Emotion: confused
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
30 April 2008 @ 01:17 pm

Ok, so ive been getting dangerously close to having a social life these last few days. What started out as a relxed night going to see a friends gig became a full blown party night on sunday. Two hours at the pub, messing around in a wet playground at one in the morning, the night club until 2.30 and then back to a friends, where we stayed up till 5 and then practically passed out. I stayed at Pete's i was in no condition to walk home, and he was nice enough to lend me his bed. We could have shared it, i wouldnt have minded (if you know what i mean). But he's recently split up with someone so i didnt push it. 
Monday we had a house viewing, we're desperately trying to find somewhere with four bedrooms but its near impossible. The bungalow we saw was nice but it was way too far away. We have another viewing on saturday, if its got four bedrooms and a roof im taking it, im sick of worrying over this. I then went to lunch with Pete, he is such a nice guy. 
Yesterday i had a drama rehearsal, the assesments are tomorrow and im really excited about it!! Then last night i was invited to the pub with Pete, Maddy, Maria and Ryan. We didnt actually make it to the pub but there were copius amounts of alcohol consumed and we ended up in Maria's room watching Father Ted. Pete was at next to me and as he got more and more drunk, he got closer and closer. Im not gonna lie, i enjoyed it! But i didnt stay the night, i walked home. I felt bad for him coz he;s obviously still hurting after being dumped and i want him to be okay.

Tomorrow i've invited them all around for a little shindig to celebrate the end of assessments. Maybe something will happen then, who knows? Under the cut are some pics of these people i keep talkig about, just so you're not in the dark ... enjoy! xx

 

 
 
location: dormroom
Emotion: bored
Tunes: who's line is it anyway
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
22 April 2008 @ 08:50 pm
Ok, i decided to do some icons while i had the chance. In this batch are greg proops icons for greg week at [info]wliialove and some late ryan and colin ones too, and some that have been lurking around my comp for a while. Comments are love, credit if you can and i am not taking requests at this point in time but i will be in a few weeks.

preview:

   

 
 
location: dormroom
Emotion: drained
Tunes: Hilary duff - our lips are sealed
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
22 April 2008 @ 09:40 am

Ok, its been a little while since i last updated properly. Normally i would still be in bed at this time (9.41 am) but due to the frickin fire alarm going off without any reason too ... again! ... im up and ready for action. And just as a side note, the next time it goes off and there is nothing burning, im setting fire to something myself. So keep your eyes open for news of the ginger arsonist from kingston university.

Anyway, my first peice of news is for the guys over at

[info]wliialove . Sorry i couldnt contribute to ryan/colin week, but it looks like you did great without me. I will try to do something for Greg week (of course, its Greg, come on!) but just to let you know its assignment time here and im really behind so im busy a lot of the time now. So im not ignoring you, im just putting off my wliia love for a little bit to help me ... you know ... pass my course. 

OK, apart from research and classes i havent really been up to much. I went into london last week to watch the Graham Norton show being filmed! It was a great night, his guests were Tony Curtis and Kevin Bacon, and Robyn sang her new single which i love! A fantastic night. 
And last night, when googling my all time favourite writer, Bruce Robinson, who i happen to fancy like crazy, i came across a brand new picture of him and had like the ultimate of fan girl squee moments. You can see it for yourself HERE, hes not your conventional hottie but his eyes just turn my knees into jelly.

 

Thats it for now, will try to get some more icons and things out for you soon xxxx

 
 
location: dormroom
Emotion: pissed off
Tunes: silence
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
12 April 2008 @ 03:14 pm
I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really want to be a model!!!!!!!!

Why God why did you make me only 5 foot 4!!!????

And then invent a tv show that was both addictive and taunting to the short among us who cant be models. Damn you Tyra Banks for being so pretty!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

*clears throat* I apologise for that. Too much drama from America's next top model. Im fine now.
 
 
location: dormroom
Emotion: pissed off
Tunes: america's next top model
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
06 April 2008 @ 01:29 pm

Alright, im back at my Uni flat now, i got back yesterday. Mum and dad drove me and hung around for a little bit. I was sad to see them go, but i'll be back home before i know it. 
I started my alone time with a little bit of who's line, then i found myself looking up episodes of america's next top model on youtube. For some reason i find that show inspiring, instead of depressing, and with my bet still looming over me, i need all the inspiration i can get. 
Then i decided to get off my butt and do some excercises. I got my fitness dvd and started that. First of all, easy to follow routines my arse! I got so lost, i had to rewind and play it all again coz i just couldnt get it. After a while i turned it off, played my music full blast and just jumped around the room for like a half hour. Just as effective and way more fun. 
After dinner, i stuck on some sex and the city, coz we all need a girly night every now and again, and i pampered myself. It was probably just a way of making myslef feel better about being alone again. 

This morning i woke up refreshed, which is unusual for me, and i suddenyl remembered that the new series of Doctor Who started last night! I went straight to BBC iplayer and watched it over breakfast. I am loving the new theme music and David Tennant ... just as gorgeous as always. I love Catherine Tate too, i think shes a great contrast to the seriousness of the last two side kicks. And that little surprise at the end!!! Very exciting. I wont say anymore in case any of you havent had the chance to see it yet. Plus, i woke up to snow!!!!!! I know its weird to get snow in Apirl, but in England, you're just thankful its not rain. it was awesome.

Anyway, thats what ive been up to. What about you lot. Let me know whats happening in your lives!! xx

 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
03 April 2008 @ 02:17 pm
Ok, ive been feeling down aboot myself lately, mainly because im gaining weight like crazy and im not happy with it. In an attempt to make myslef feel better i spoke to a friend from univeristy who always makes me feel better, partly because i have a crush on him. Anyway, he didnt make me feel better this time. He coaxed my derpession out of me and i ended up asking him wether, as a man, he found, me attractive.

I know, i know, big mistake, and i got the usual answer. He told me that im not overly attractive at first glance but "when people get to know me" (i hate that phrase) then my attractiveness comes through in my personality. Thats basically what i hear all the time and im sick of it, and im not ashamed of it. I have nothing against these women who dont give a shit about their appearance and focus everything on their intellegence, i used to be one, but now im getting older and the lack of male attention is worrying me. Is it so wrong to want to be attractive from the word go? Or to be able to have fun with guys without having to let them get to know you? We only live once right, and i want to have some fun with my love life. 

Anyway, mum could tell i was upset and she sat down and had a talk with me. And she offered me bribery. She's bet me £50 that she can prove the only thing holding back my attractiveness is my weight, and that if i lost some i would be fighting the guys off with a stick. I couldnt pass up an oppurtunity like that and so we are on. When i get to my desired weight, i will re-assess my love life situation and see who was right. Wow, i guess when mum thinks shes right she really goes for it. Anyway, we start next week, once im back in my flat. So wish me luck!! xx
 
 
I'd give my left hand to be ambidextrous
31 March 2008 @ 05:59 pm
Im feeling a little down about myself, and so, for whatever reason, i decided to look up pictures of ridiculously beautiful people and make icons out of them. Didnt help my ego, but i got some good icons. Some america's next top model and tyra banks, fashion photography, keira knightley, natalie portman, Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan. Hope you enjoy, comment and credit!!! 

preview:

   

 
 
location: living room
Emotion: complacent
Tunes: coronation street